October 29, 2009

should be...

It is suppose to be easy, comfortable.

Love can come with guide. Guide does not need to come with love.

You’re young we both know, time was what you need and I gave you. I had great memories but something was missing each time. Is it that you wanted me to be happy but you weren’t happy inside coz deep inside your happiness was not born out of me.

I wanted to do something else, you did as well. I saw things in this way, u saw in another. Yet we compromise, whatever you wanna do I’ll do, and so did you. Truth is you know I don’t like it, I said I wanna stop. From there we do our own things again.

Told myself, I should not leave you to be alone, I stayed nearby, hoping to be there when you need me. Sometimes I could not be there physically and it hurts both you and me. You know I always try my best to surprise you, but maybe that was not enough.

I still remember how you look when I gave you that lantern. It’s weird that you did not look surprise at all. I don’t mind if you don’t. But why when I look at you, you rather sms another person at that moment. I never felt more disappointed. What was on your mind? You apologize, but that special moment had passed. It’s gone. I wanted to see your face light up, but u didn’t.

I told you how I felt, I told how I would want you to treat me. You are supposed to be the one who should know me better. We seem so estranged, and I still can’t accept you going crazy after another TB than me. You could be so excited about her in front of me. What about me?

Am I not good enough? Yes maybe I am just not because I start to feel tired. I have no strength to pull out jokes that you don’t even laugh.

untitled

i cant sleep the whole night...just coz i feel so stress...i din get to study today (or should i say yesterday)...thats y i tot of just sleeping the nite off...but then i could not....wake up at 12am all of a sudden...n took out econs to study...

i could study so well in th emiddle of the nite..i feel so calm...i felt as if nothing is on...everyone is asleep... but not my room mate...we study on our seperate tables till dawn breaks...n it is 6am in the morning now...


untill i open ur blog to read...i knew i would find something unpleasant, after what had happen today (yesterday)... your speechless makes me speechless...i never post bout our problems because i never felt that it were problems...until when i need you the most u keep banging me down...